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Friday, May 25, 2012

Wow.

It's been awhile! Sorry guys, I just made another blog a little while ago, about some more personal stuff... i'm not sure why though. I'm glad to be back! Let's see... updates on life. I'm now almost fifteen, and I'm way excited. The legal age for my permit, and also going to high school!(: I like a guy that I met just a little while ago--like a couple weeks, and you could say that we're kind of sweethearts if you want to look at it that way. Why, because I recently found out that he feels the same way about me.

I am so happy, because for once in my life it seems like everything is finally going at least a little bit how I planned instead of completely backfiring every single step I take to get to where I want to go. I've been writing a lot of songs lately, about reflection and looking back on everything I can see every single mistake I've made, and I am so happy that I now have the strength and will to change that to be a better person. I had  a little power struggle with some internal stuff back there for awhile, but now I feel completely healed and energized like I'm able to do everything that I wanted.

I don't remember what I wrote about the last time I wrote because it was so long ago, but what I do know is that whatever depressing stuff I was saying or going through doesn't even phase me now. It is seriously like a meteor hit the earth, and turned everything upside down. I can't stop smiling now because of how happy I am. I haven't really gotten all of my issues under control, but that isn't what really matters to me right now. All that matters is that I'm taking life the way I want it, and not the way the devil does.

I feel so strong right now, like nothing can bring me down but I know that isn't true. I guess at one point all of that will come back, but for now I decided I'm going to live in the moment, but still think through my decisions carefully instead of just winging it like I used to do. I guess that's what kind of ruined all of my relationships before was that I was to straight forward. I'm not talking about drawing back completely, but kind of talking less about how much I like this person or that person.

I have to leave now, but I'll write more in a couple hours or so. I love every single one of you for helping me get through this.

Emma <3 (:

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